For Alpha Newberry’s review of Part 1, please click here. Please note this review contains mild spoilers. -- Ed.
Call the roller of big cigars, the muscular one, and bid him whip in kitchen cups concupiscent curds. Harry Potter is dead. Well, at least the franchise is over. Sad to think that a journey many of us began so long ago has now come to an end. From Christmas time 2001 to summer blockbuster 2011, Harry Potter fans have jumped, screamed, laughed, grimaced, and yes, even cried at the big screen adventures of the young wizarding trio: Harry, Hermione, and Ron. The final installment, “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2,” which would be just as aptly named “Harry Potter Goes to War” is exactly what's to be expected. The series continues with great effects, solid cinematography, a fluffy plot, spot-on supporting actors, and leads who though not mind-blowing do their job well enough. Spoilers and HP mythology ahead.
It all starts with the the usual cloak and dagger routine. The horcruxes. Everything is about the horcruxes, and our brave heroes must find and destroy them. First stop is Gringott's, the goblin-run bank, to raid the Lestrange vault for a precious piece of Voldemort's soul. Of course things run afoul, and Hermione's awkward portrayal of Bellatrix gets our spellcasters busted, wet, and almost squashed, after which they are nearly smothered in gold by a curse. Not to worry though. They get their prize and ride out on a big white dragon. Par for the course.
At this point the movie is barely half an hour in, but it's time to head back home to Hogwart's for the final, epic battle. That's not exactly Harry's plan mind you, but by now Voldemort's minions practically run the school, so Harry, Hermione, and Ron are found out as soon as they enter the nearby town of Hogsmeade. Luckily they are saved by Dumbledore's bearded brother and then escorted to the weirdest baccalaureate ever by Neville, who has of course taken over as leader of the resistance. Sound like plot strings being tied up? Well now things start getting crazy.
Voldemort, through a telepathic transmission, demands that Harry and only Harry be given up in order to save everyone. Of course only the hated Slytherins agree, and they are promptly sent to the dungeon. Huzzah. Then it's time to man the battlements, cast the defensive spells, and bring in that warm feeling that comes only during the buildup for a schoolyard brawl that's been 10 years in the making. One could almost imagine Alice Cooper's “Be Cool to Your School” playing in the background instead of orchestral swells. In a way it was smart thinking to finish the series like this. With Hogwarts destroyed by all the magical fisticuffs, it was no doubt much easier to strike the set. One drawback though, no place to hold the graduation ceremony.
The last hour and a half is a bit more than just a long action sequence. True love is revealed in the heat of battle, Snape is redeemed, Harry saves Draco's life, and there's even time for a touch of armchair philosophy in a metaphysical version of King's Cross station. Then the home team wins, the guys get the girls, a few expendable characters die, a character says a curse word (a real one), and everybody who’s still alive gets married and has magical babies. The end. No more will we hear Voldemort and Draco say “Potter” with surprisingly nuanced disdain. No more will we feel the pride of Gryffindor upon winning a Quidditch match. All that's left are the memories, and of course the DVD box sets, and the special edition box sets, and the extended version special edition box sets. Perhaps they'll find a way to show our heroes in action once more in their adult lives. Until then, HP marathon anyone? It will only take 20 hours. I'll buy the ice cream.
ⓒ Jeju Weekly 2009 (http://www.jejuweekly.com)
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